I watched the movie Alien: Covenant last night on free to air TV. The original movie was very entertaining. I'd suggest that's because despite the crew keeping to the manual, the Alien still causes havoc.
But this latest incarnation of the franchise leaves a lot to be desired. A colony space ship, which is no doubt worth hundreds of billions of dollars, is diverted by an obviously incompetent Captain to a previously unknown planet, despite the protest of the second-in-charge. A good case could be made for the Captain to be relieved of his command for even suggesting such nonsense.
Then without further ado, they arrive at the new planet and descend to the surface without fully checking it out. Huh? Oh well, then they kind of split up (never ever split up in a sci-fi - ahem), and as they split one guy says to the other: ' behave yourself with my wife.' The wife of one of the guys is staying with this other dude. Oh, here we are on a previously undiscovered planet, putting careers in jeopardy on a whim, and while there one guy suspects the other guy of indecent intentions toward his wife. Seriously, this is stupid beyond belief.
Then of course we find the Alien is on the planet. Oh no, face hugger paradise (who'd a thunk), and the Captain is enticed by a robot, no less, to look inside a seed pod that just happens to open. Ahh, never look inside, that's a rule of sci-fi too you know. Never ever look inside.
And now everything unravels and we have the sexay, kick-ass, female protagonist who is also kinda vulnerable in a University graduate kind of way, able to survive against all odds. Helped along of course by an insolent and incompetent helmsman, who is excused his utterly cretinous behaviour because he wears a cowboy hat and says things like 'I'm coming in hot'.
I mean, really? The only good thing about the movie is the location of Fiordland National Park in New Zealand.
Rating: 1 star out of 7.
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