Minister for the South Island

New Zealand's National Party have pushed the panic button now they're polling below Labour for the first time since the General Election in 2023. Prime Minister, that baldy nincompoop, Christopher Luxon has shuffled his cabinet. He's basically rearranging the deckchairs on the Titanic, so I won't go into the complexities of it all. Rest assured, whatever he does the government will remain a bunch of cockwombles without a good idea anywhere amongst the lot of them.

But he has created a new position, Minister for the South Island. The country already has the Minister for Auckland, which is another completely pointless office. So, why a government minister just for the South Island?

It must be South Island independence is gathering pace. Apparently, a Facebook page on the subject has more followers than the ACT party, which is part of the government. I have noted that whenever I mention the subject, I receive more than average engagement on the matter. No doubt Luxon is trying to head off such groups evolving into fully-fledged political parties trying to grab the all-important 5% threshold party vote.

What could South Island independence look like? It could be a completely separate country, or exist within New Zealand as part of a federal or confederate structure.

Personally, I support a confederacy. In simple terms, a confederate state would be completely independent apart from defense, foreign affairs and trade agreements.

But, what would the South Island have exclusively of its own? Here's a list:

• police and criminal law
• money
• finance
• minerals
• tax
• sport
• immigration
• education
• healthcare
• social welfare
• infrastructure
• environment

This confederacy would have a customs union with the North Island, and citizens from the North Island would have free movement and the right to settle in the South (and vice versa).

What would this confederate state be called? I am opposed to New Munster; what about Great Southernland? Great because it would take in the South Island and all its offshore islands; plus Stewart, Chatham, Auckland and Campbell Islands and the Ross Sea. 

How would this Great Southernland function? It would have low taxation, fewer public servants, better schools, efficient hospitals, a motivated workforce, and an active and growing mining sector and a manufacturing base. The only money it would send to Wellington would be for defense, maintaining embassies and a place at the UN, and in keeping trade agreements functioning.

What do you think?